Green Tea For Weight Loss: Fact Or Fiction?

Weight loss, and green tea’s popularity has been hype with regard to the few recent reports on green tea. There is a ongoing debate among the experts of the various green tea varieties or tea types for weight loss. The latest reports suggest that there could be benefits from most green tea types and that any single type of tea may not be such a big thing. That in turn leads one to question “Is Green Tea a Weight Loss Fad?”

The basics

There are four basic types of tea including: Green, Black, Oolong or Wu-Long.

The difference is in the way these teas are processed. teas that are black usually require oxidation which oxidizes the tea color, giving it a rich rich aroma. The processing does not affect the active ingredients of the tea. Green tea which is less processed is less oxidized giving it a more delicate flavor and aroma, this leads to black teas with a more robust flavor and aroma. This is what makes green tea the choice tea for weight loss.

The benefits of green tea

• The primary ingredient is caffeine, which gives you an energy boost, promoting thermogenesis and thus resulting in increased fat reduction.

• Several research has shown that theanine, caffeine and the catechins (chemicals that give green tea its sweet flavor) are all from the leaves. The anorectic and catabolic (break down fat cells) affect by the tea, and are believed to promote weight loss, as the active ingredients speed up your metabolism and help to burn fat faster.

• The antioxidants in green tea also help to protect the body against arrived harmful substances, which in most cases are in the form of free radicals, which are given to the body because of stress, unhealthy eating and even pollutants found in tap water and food.

What kinds of green tea should you buy?

There are three tea types that you can buy. The top of the line being wulong / wulong buds, which are steeped two times before seasoning. The popular Oolong tea, has gotten much media attention recently. Oolong tea comes in bags and also depending on the brand or cartons, as well stir-filled or in solo tea bags.

Tea for weight loss – and other health benefits

Tea, in its naturally raw state, is nutrient rich. It contains powerful antioxidants such as epigallocatechin gallate (EGCG). In addition, green tea contains the modifying polyphenols called Binding affinity proteins. A binding protein is a tag- affiliate protein that unites with a dilute sample of your blood supply to dilute the effect of the sample on your circulation. With the aid of this dilution, the amount of harm to our bodies is reduced. Online sources say that an EGCG study showed that it helps regulates blood pressure, reducing plaques and reducing bad cholesterol.

Tea, in it’s natural form, is rich in many other nutrients than those that are processed or added in the forms of supplements. Other benefits include that it helps prevent certain cancers and may even have been used by the ancient Chinese to treat diseases such as cancer and control theirappetite.

Studies of the effects of green tea on health and diet longevity are still underway. For example, currently in theorbination of tea, the ORAC value is only taken as a measurement of the amount of polyphenols and anti-oxidants present. The study so far has focused on green that is whole plant extracts not just green tea itself. However, from the studies, it would seem that green tea benefits are far more than what has been discovered by the research and testing to date.

Is it really weight loss tea?

Yes, it might be from the “herbs” category of tea, but if you search for reviews on that kind of tea you will find many other kinds of tea, so if it’s green you’ll find a whole new set of benefits.

Some other health benefits of green tea are:

• helps preventBLE nails and belly wrinkles

• protect againstER HEIGHT Accumulation

• protects againstARY2017bs dipped into it

• helps prevent tooth decay and other cavities

• helps combat premature aging• helps keep you cool

• increase your endurance• help fight Teranish disease

• and it’s a natural antibiotic

• and because it contains antioxidants, it’s a very powerful weight loss ingredient.

It seems that green tea weight loss programs are beginning to pop up everywhere. Remember, before you invest in a weight loss tea, research and make sure the product you use is made of 100% whole plant parts and is as pure as possible. Limit your use of supplement tea to three times per day.

 

Best LGBTQ+ Films on Netflix

In case of a tie, Tomatometer scores for all films were averaged. Also, Indigenous films and Hispanic films were omitted from the analysis. Tomatometer scores for LGBTQ+ films on Netflix released on or after January 1st, 2017 are listed last. Netflix’s ranking of LGBTQ+ films and rankings for LGBTQ+ films released elsewhere are reported here.

Best LGBTQ+ Films

Kate Plays Christine

Kate Plays Christine is a low-budget horror/romance about a young girl who moves to the small Massachusetts town of Busfield, where the local teenage librarian, Maxine, has a crush on her classmate, Kate. Kate accidentally murders Maxine’s boyfriend, Mike, then pretends her death was the result of an assault by a masked man. Tomatometer score: 66% Tomatometer rating: 4.7 (“Fresh”) 89 % What Happens in Vegas: Season

Director: Keith Calder Hawkins

From the director of Timecop, the award-winning Timecop has two incredible trade franchises. The first film’s premise – a series of haphazard events that loosely connect ones that could get messy – is exceedingly clever. The second film’s premise is even better: a group of 40 or so young characters are caught in a tragic and sexually charged situation: 13-year old high school girl Lindsay finds out she has a kinky turn on and decides to expose her to risk it all by dating a stranger. It’s the ideal sum of all the best parts of those film series, and works magnificently in its own special way, when it needs to. DP-PA Oliver Jean sees his chance to shine, but having previously explored the psychological films Super Troopers and Torn, he’s ready for anything. “Making this film allows me to delve into other avenues and territory,” he says. Tomatometer score: 73% Tomatometer rating: 4.8 (“Midnight”) 91 % Purge

Director: James DeMonaco

Our second film review looks at a crime thriller. Mark, the hero of this tale, is enrolled in a man-made commune where he may or may not be in touch with the spirit world. He immediately gets a taste of what it’s like to be hunted by criminals and starts to experience supernatural occurrences. Tomatometer score: 6% Tomatometer rating: 2.4 (“Fresh”) 40 % Anna Karenina

Director: Leo Tolstoy

Engrossing themes such as the vicissitudes of parent-child relationships and the survival of the family tree can be found in numerous works. All The Young Dudes and Strange Days gained their high scores on this one. Tomatometer score: 40% Tomatometer rating: 2.4 (“Fresh”) 24 % Freaky Friday

Director: John Waters

Who would’ve thought that a film using footage of a soap opera would strike a chord with viewers? A classic that posts beautifully, Freaky Friday is the stuff of dark comedy, and a rare example of a film with both a socially-conscious message and a well-crafted film noir twist that stays balanced and doesn’t veer too far from social commentary. Tomatometer score: 46% Tomatometer rating: 2.3 (“Midnight”) 40 % Adam Blampied

Director: Adrian Thomas-Hunt

Adam’s journey to got to television is a truly wild one, but his unlikely quest toward respectability is plotted just right. Situated squarely in the get-crazed noir genre, this is an inviting but archetypal tale of a sly cop in L.A., trying to do his part in fighting the industry’s rampant misogyny. A steady stream of terrific performances and a well-realized intent cause to root for Adam throughout, but his tragic fate doesn’t offer the same comfort. Tomatometer score: 43% Tomatometer rating: 2.3 (“Fresh”) 57 % Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li and Ryu

Director: Joe Haythe

Our first film review looks at a martial arts film. Deep sense of family ties are the drive behind this film, and its ensemble cast of an international cast must pull together to fight perceived stigma. And that can only be done with a bit of baddies. FX’s stop-motion epic Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li and Ryu features some of the greatest sketches and animation in blockbuster history, and continues to impress, thanks to its hyper-rebellious and reclusive protagonist, Ryu, and a sumptuous and funky score by the late, great, De-Gaetano Waller.

LGBTQ Meaning, What does LGBTQ Stand for?

We use many abbreviations in our lives, one of these abbreviations is LGBTQ. So what do LGBTQ and sub expansions mean? LGBTQ stand for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer.

A lesbian is a woman who feels physical and / or emotional attraction to another woman. Lesbian means gay woman. Women who feel attracted to both men and women are bisexual. It may be that the person’s self-definition or the sexual identity he / she assigns on himself does not correspond to his behavior.

Gay is an adjective, term and noun meaning gay. The term generally used to denote male homosexuals is also used to describe homosexual women. From the word “gay” in English; In English, it passed from the “gai” origin in Old French. The term gay, which originally meant “cheerful, careless” and “brightly colored, flamboyant”, was first used by male homosexuals to describe themselves since the 1960s. The use of the word “gay” in its other meanings has also disappeared over time. The word lesbian, meaning female homosexual, has been used since the 1800s.

Bisexuality, romantic attraction, sexual attraction or sexual behavior regardless of gender, or romantic or sexual attraction towards people of any gender or gender identity.

The term bisexuality is often used in the context of human attraction to denote romantic or sexual feelings towards both men and women, and it is one of the three main classifications of sexual orientation, along with heterosexuality and homosexuality, which are part of the heterosexual-homosexual continuum. A bisexual identity does not have to feel equal sexual attraction to both sexes; People who are often more attracted to one sex also identify themselves as bisexual.

Bisexuality has been observed throughout history in various human populations and in the animal kingdom. But the term bisexuality, like hetero– and homosexuality, was coined in the 19th century.

The transgender or trans person’s gender identity is not compatible with the assigned gender. The term transgender person is used to describe people with this condition and is a phenomenon completely independent of sexual orientation; trans people are also gay, homosexual, homosexual, etc. They can be defined as; Some trans people think that traditional labels of sexual orientation are inadequate or impractical to them.

The definition of trance includes:

“Individuals clearly do not conform to traditional definitions of male or female gender roles, but move between them”

“Individuals feel that the gender they are assigned to is wrong or incomplete in identifying themselves based on the sexual organ they have at birth.

“Failure to be identified or represented by the gender assigned (and accepted gender) at birth”

Queer is an umbrella term that does not fit into a heterosexual or binary gender system, that includes gender identity, sexual orientation, or both. Repeating the definitions of LGBT; The theory that explains their social, intellectual and political expansions as well as their historical and cultural developments. Although queer is a word with negative qualities such as “weird, weird, crooked” in Turkish, its use in political and theoretical issues started in the 1990s. Especially with the activities carried out especially in the academic field with the activist group called Queer Nation established in New York, the concept became concrete.

A Queer Arab Identity?

In this presentation, I discuss the notion of Queer Arab, and examine the ideological gesture it performs. What does Queer Arab achieve as identity formation? Whom does it refer to, if it is anything but self-referential?

My initial project was to discuss Queer Arab and the possibility of militantism in the Middle East, rather than mobilize my theoretical apparatus, constantly deferring me as distant organic intellectual. I can write about Queer Arab in so far as I imagine myself as a western academic. In other words, it is precisely my position of academic that allows me to imagine or even entertain such notion as Queer Arab identity. To those who expect this paper to perform a synthesis, I feel obliged to warn you that this paper’s contention, at best, is to generate questions and expose contradictions, its own , among others.

For all political purposes, I believe in constructing a gay and lesbian identity in the Arab world. Visibility is a key factor in that process. People should see that gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered are not the uncanny deviance of human sexuality, and slowly realize that gay and lesbian-ness ought to be socially integrated. Conceptualizing a queer identity is necessary for political and civil rights activism. For this reason alone am I invested in talking about gay and lesbian identities and their conditions of possibility. The danger, however, arises when we take for granted the constructedness of such identity, and relegate it to an essence, an inherent characteristic, tantamount to a certain style of life, dressing, talking, and identifying especially. Gay and lesbian are a socio-political construction with a specific history and history of struggle and political achievements. However, a political mobilization necessitates a linguistic mobilization as well, i.e., a rethinking of homosexuality the way it occurs in Arabic language.

Haboub(a)

Let’s talk about a word that signifies our sexuality, and grabs its complexity with a mere combination of letters. As of this moment of enunciation, we hope to exist as self-defined entities and autonomous subjects, responsible for that ideological gesture we bring upon ourselves. Ideally, we seek a word that detaches itself from the stigma with which our homosexual practices had to struggle for so long. The term “ideally” is quite problematic. When we, as lesbian and gay Arabs refer to each others as Haboub(a) (“sweety” in Arabic), we ought to realize that this term, with all the “positive” implications of its usage, posits itself in relation to Tobji, Shaz, Souhaki-ya, Louty (Faggot and the like). It posits itself as lack, lack of those pejorative conations against which it differentially establishes itself as meaningful utterance.

Haboub is no longer effeminate or doomed to perish like Lout’s people. Haboub is like “Black is Beautiful” in the 70’sit is gay. Such term, however, risks falling prey to its own ideological lure. How so? We are debating haboub as a potential signifier for Gay and Lesbian Arabs. But is gay and lesbian Arabs unproblematic to begin with? Our usage of gay Arabs, even though for all heuristic and temporary purposes, is an appellation that is to be held culturally accountable just like haboub(a). Gay and Arab, lesbian and Arab, it almost suggests these net searches wherein we type several words, and wait for the computer to combine them under a certain rubric-to produce a synthesis. The computer process, its synthesis, can be an interesting analogy, but is definitely an alarming one as well. The machine will proceed by generating the entries, i.e., the possible convergences and common grounds between gay and Arab. But what if, when we type in gay and lesbian Arabs, we obtain something along the lines of “under the Saudi law, homosexuality is a crime punishable by either death, flogging” or what have you? How is this output significant in terms of the way we conduct our search? Is it the case that the computer is predisposed to read only certain kinds of approximation and association in that very specific vein, just like Islam and terrorism for instance? This potential output signifies that the computer and the cultural context in which it arises on the one hand, and our particular stand point as Arab intellectuals on the other, may be quite antithetical. Therefore, when we discuss gay and lesbian Arabs, we try to bring together two concepts, two ideologies, overlooking their contextual and linguistic differences.

Gay in a middle eastern context does not refer to what the latter refers to in a western one. The sexual practice alone is not sufficient to appropriate the word, and expect it to be harmonious with its new cultural surrounding. In other words, how is it possible for the word to rethink its occurrence within that specific paradigm? At this stage, yet another major question arises: representation.

From our particular intellectual, political, and even geographical stand point, are we entitled to represent Arab queers or provide them with a word to adopt unproblematically? How can we avoid the risk of remaining at the level of the detached diasporic intelligentsia which will repatriate in a huge container, an appellation, accompanied by an extensive set of sexual and identity politics to go witha normative package, that is? This is not to say, however, that producing a “positive” word to refer to gay in Arabic is a fruitless task; the concerns I raise constitute the task’s self-reflexive matrix, nothing more. In order to rephrase the net-search analogy mentioned earlier, I call attention to a personal frustration. Every time I think and write about gay Arabs, I find myself reiterating critical discourses on Queerness from the 1960’s, 70’s. Every time I imagine myself to be finally producing original thought and analysis, I find it thought of and analysed previously in western queer contexts. Why so? I’m faced with this wall of reiteration given that my approach still seems not to question enough “queer” as concept, social practice, and identity in the first place. When I think of Queer Arab, I have the western notion of queer in mind, despite my attempts to expose such tension, as I tried to do earlier. I find myself unable to problematize queerness in the Arab context at any fundamental level.

Therefore, I make the same observations made in the 60’s and 70’s on queers in America. My entrapment in the western paradigm reduces my intellectual enterprise to a correspondence theory, in constant struggle with that historical gap. But in what other ways can I problematize Queer Arabs? How can I theorize such phenomena especially that a Queer Arab theory (or theories) is important in so far as it might generate a counter-discourse on sexuality and power in the Middle East. I want to reemphasize the Realpolitik character of my task. I strongly envisage a queer militantism in the Arab world, one that brings about civil rights to homosexuals in the region, without exclusively having recourse to human rights organizations. In few years down the road, the United Nations might pressure certain countries to acknowledge homosexual rights, but what would that gesture signify? That rights are only possible under the rubric of a gay and lesbian western identities, universalized in terms of human rights and identity formation through NGO’s or other globalizing institutions an imported doctrine?

Before I further interrogate queer identity as a possibility at the political level in the Middle East, I need to interrogate identity as such. How does the notion of citizenship inflect a queer identity? Is a queer identity at all possible as socio-politcal construct in Arab societies to begin with? Can we talk about Arab “society” as unified body of social and religious formations? Is Queer Arab a romanticization in so far as it attempts to recapture an Arab homosexual essence la Abu-Firass al-Hamadani? In other words, is Queer Arab a fundamentalist discourse, a radical discourse, a return to homosexuality’s roots in an Arab context of a Greek model scenerio? Can we think of Queer Arab as being a pan-Arabist discourse by precisely disindentifying from a hegemonic sexual practice, i.e., do we identify as Arabs by precisely inhabiting that site of sexual others, and does that site reflect and construct our Arabness? Does it imagine it as ideal origin? A counter-discourse on sexuality produced in the Diaspora reiterates and re-produces a dominant political discourse on Arab unity. The sense of Queer Arab’s community does not lie in what they have inherently in common as Arab identified homosexuals, but rather in the ways in which a particular level of exclusion constitutes homosexuality as privileged for the construction of identity.

Queer Arabs, and by coming out as such, exclude themselves to form that ideological community of Arabs, and construct Arabs as community based on ideology. Queer Arab identity is viable in so far as it exploits that moment of self-incurred exclusion. Queer Arabs form a community of rejects, and yet they form a community that transcends ethnic, religious and other social determinisms. We can hence come together as Arabs by choice rather than belonging and endoctrination as was the case in the 50’s and 60’s with the rise of Socialism in the Arab world. It is precisely our choice to come out and engage in homosexual practices, that we achieve the coherence of such notion as Arab, henceforth rendered dynamic in its very conceptulization of community. Arab was always defined along overdetermined lines of geography, religion, language, and ethnicity, especially. Queer Arab challenges such determinisms; it reappropriates and salvages Arab as an ideological gesture, produced at a moment of consent, a homosexual consent between two adult individuals who decide to come together. Queer Arab overdetermines Arab identity at the site of desire, it desires to see this identity coming. Queer imagines and constructs Arab as binding effect, and not vice versa. Queer practices nourish and sustain Arab as ideal positing. It is precisely our sexual practice that make Arabs of us. Queer and Arab are complementary. Without being an identity itself, queerness, so to say, consolidates our sense of Arab identity. Queerness has the form of identity, it conditions it. Our sexuality makes of us Arabs to each others, and constitutes a site of overdeterminacy that allows us to imagine ourselves as Arab identified individuals. I become Arab to you at that site of coming together.

In The Sublime Object of Ideology, Slavoj Zizec argues that in monarchies, individuals imagine themselves as subjects-to-one-other given their respective positions vis–vis the king whom they overdetermine as a centralised power. At surface level, Queer Arab presents itself as a counter-discourse, a site of dissent from a dominant ideology. However, Queer Arab performatively reinscribes and affirms such ideology internally. The radical other of socio-political discourse in the Middle East, becomes always already is the discourse’s utter interior, its binding effect that which allows the discourse to operate in the first place. Queer Arab spears that discourse the pathological positing of identity in terms of ethnicity, religion, and the like. Foucault’s productive hypothesis characterizes Power as repressing such notion as homosexual, but it also produces homosexuality and on it a multiplicity of discourses that eludes homosexuality as object of repression. Discursive practices produce and not merely signify their symbolic objects. A discourse on queer sexuality constructs the latter as other to that imagined object of repression. Queer Arab constructs homosexuality so as to de- essentialise it. Power projects its holistic fantasy, its fantasy of negating its fundamental contradiction. Power’s superficial/conscious fantasy is a repressive hypothesis which represents power as repressing all obvious dissidence to maintain its centrality and incontestability.

Power, however, operates at a more fundamental and unconscious level; it does not maintain itself through repression as an end in itself, but through repression in so far as the latter will proliferate discourses on identity, identities that will imagine themselves as such vis a vis a centralized power structure. In the Queer Arab’s context, power’s immediate reaction is to outcast such notion, and does so quite successfully, priori. This repression of homosexuality as practice allows us to entertain a Queer Arab identity, a notion that answers and returns power’s demand for stability and unity.

Oppression and a queer identity are symbiotic. They operate as each others’ fantasies. That said, I still need to address the political and ethical implications of such analysis. Is repression justified in so far as it maintains a queer identity, imagined in the Diaspora? At this stage, I appeal to the constructedness of a queer identity as strategic political practice, a bargaining power , as viable as its oppression. Power, or, and to stick to Foucault’s differentiation, the micro-physics of power, lies in its illusion, in its possibility of creating that illusion of omnipotence, an illusion that we construct and legitimize from our respective subject positions. Zizec discusses Kafka’s depiction of bureaucracy, a notion that becomes overdetermined in terms of its opressive modes due to the ways in which subjects relate to themselves in relation to it. They construct it as absolute. We construct our own entrapment in the network, its our masochistic fantasies that we feed, and of which we feed. I might be accused of idealizing Queer Arab, but how else can I proceed, how can I not idealize that which is only an idea, a hypothesis, a coming. I can only idealize, and approximate through a mimetic gesture the material reflection of Queer Arab identity. This is not say, however, that I have dicussed a mere condition of possibility, but rather a condition that bears the possibility of subversion in the ways in which it redefines political discourses as such.

There is no Queer Arab identity, but there is no auto-sufficient/autarctic “Arab” either. Arab is constantly demanding queerness to accomplish its relve (sublation) in the dialectics of identity. Arab is a queer in-itself.

The Politics of Naming: A Queer Arab Identity?

By N.D. Plume, 2000 @ Ahbab

Call to Rectorate of Hacettepe University

Call for morality to Rectorate of Hacettepe University for their unlawful behavior!

The call for action which addresses Hacettepe University Rectorate’s oppression and censorship towards queer research and LGBTI+ students is published.

The call for action which we also signed is as follows…

We are in solidarity with our fellow students against systematic oppression and censorship policy of Hacettepe University Rectorate towards Queer Studies Community. We condemn Rectorate’s position which disregards equality, human rights and academic freedom.

Our call to Rectorate of Hacettepe University: It is imperative for the order of a democratic society that you act accordingly with universal ethical principles, fulfill your duties arising from the constitution and laws, and comply with fundamental human rights. We demand that you abandon your discriminatory and unlawful attitude towards your LGBTI+ students and fulfill your obligations properly.

We stand by the Queer Studies Society and our friends in their struggle for rights.

SIGNTORIES

17 Mayıs Derneği
Aydın LGBTİ+ Dayanışması
Bahçeşehir Üniversitesi Renkli Çatı Kulübü
Bilkent Üniversitesi Kadın Çalışmaları Topluluğu
Çöpsüz ODTÜ İnisiyatifi
Genç LGBTİ+ Derneği
Hacettepe Eşitlik
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Biyoloji Topluluğu
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Dayanışma Ağı
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Hayvan Hakları ve Doğayı Koruma Topluluğu
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Kadın Çalışmaları Topluluğu
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Marksist Fikir Topluluğu
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Model Birleşmiş Milletler Topluluğu
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Münazara Topluluğu
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Sanat ve Mimari Topluluğu
Hacettepe Üniversitesi Toplumsal Araştırmalar Topluluğu
Hevi LGBTİ+ Derneği
İstanbul Kültür Üniversitesi LGBTİ+ Topluluğu
İstanbul Teknik Üniversitesi Cinsiyet Kimliği ve Cinsel Yönelim Çalışmaları Kulübü
Kaos GL Derneği
Lambda İstanbul LGBTİ+ Dayanışma Derneği
Marmara Üniversitesi İnsan Hakları ve Anayasa Hukuku Araştırmaları Topluluğu
Marmara Üniversitesi Kadın Hakları Kulübü
MEF Üniversitesi LGBTQ+ Kulübü
ODTÜ Amatör Astronomi Topluluğu
ODTÜ BİYOGEN Topluluğu
ODTÜ Doğanın Çocukları
ODTÜ Emek Gençliği
ODTÜ Eşitlik
ODTÜ Kampüs Cadıları
ODTÜ Kavaklık İnisiyatifi
ODTÜ Klasik Gitar Topluluğu
ODTÜ LGBTİ+ Dayanışması
ODTÜ Marksist Fikir Topluluğu
ODTÜ Medya Topluluğu
ODTÜ Mimarlık Topluluğu
ODTÜ Münazara Topluluğu
ODTÜ Müzik Toplulukları
ODTÜ Öğrenci Kolektifi
ODTÜ Öğrenci Sendikası
ODTÜ Özgürlükçü Gençlik
ODTÜ Serüven Kültür
ODTÜ Sinema Topluluğu
ODTÜ Siyaset Bilimi Topluluğu
ODTÜ Sosyoloji Topluluğu
ODTÜ Toplumsal Cinsiyet Çalışmaları Topluluğu
ODTÜ Üniversiteli Kadın Kolektifi
ODTÜ Vegan
Özyeğin Üniversitesi LGBTİQ+ Kulübü
Sivil Alan Araştırmaları Derneği
Sunflowernet Sosyal Platformu
Türkiye LGBTİ Birliği


Credit: Mor Absolution

 

Queer Gay Sports Eye for the Hopeless Homo

As I was watching “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy,” the Bravo reality series where five fabulous gay guys transform a straight, uncultured slob, I was struck by a moment where I identified more with the hetero than the homo.

It was a scene where Carson, the fashion maven, was going through the closet of Slob ‘O The Week, and came across his collection of replica NHL jerseys. Carson picked one up that said “Gretzky” across the back and remarked with puzzlement, “Gretzky? What country is that?”

C’mon, dude, I said to the TV. How can you not know who Wayne Gretzky is, maybe the greatest hockey player ever? At least you should know he’s married to B-movie actress Janet Jones; it was in all the tabloids. I’m certainly no fashion poster boy, but even I know about Prada and Tom Ford.

The Fab Five’s apparent lack of sports knowledge led me to an idea: teaching sports-impaired gay men the basics about the world of bats, balls and pucks. Call it “Queer Sports Eye for the Hopeless Homo.” This information can be very useful in those awkward social settings where you have to interact with your ultra-straight brother-in-law, or maybe break the ice with the dad of your new boyfriend. Or even, pray tell, if your significant other would rather watch “SportsCenter” than “Trading Spaces.” I consulted our Fab Five (no, not the Michigan basketball team from the 1990s) and we came up with these following helpful hints, tips and facts about the world of sports.

Culture

–Super Bowl Sunday is a rotten day to throw a surprise birthday party for your football-loving boyfriend. It’d be like him asking you to go bowling the night of the Oscars.

–Contrary to what you may think, “Fantasy Football” is not a shower scene between you and the Green Bay Packers starting offense. It’s a game where you “draft” your own team of NFL players to compete against similar teams of your friends. But don’t be like our friend who picked his entire 2002 team based on which players were the hottest. Talent and looks do not always go hand in hand. Just ask Warren Sapp.

–“The Big Dance” is not the Palm Springs White Party. It’s the nickname for the NCAA men’s college basketball championship, a three-week hoops extravaganza featuring hot, young, sweaty jocks slapping each other on the butt while wearing tank tops and shorts and drinking lots of water. Oh, sorry, it is the White Party.

–You need to get down with the nicknames. “Shaq” is Lakers center Shaquille O’Neal; “Kobe” is fellow Laker Kobe Bryant; “A-Rod” is Texas Rangers shortstop Alex Rodriguez. “Tight end” signifies a football player positioned to the outside of the offensive line eligible to catch passes, not the headline of that hot guy you saw on Gay .com.

–Gary Glitter’s addictive “Rock and Roll Part 2” (aka the Hey! Song) is the sports national anthem, heard in every arena across the land year-round. Here are the complete lyrics, sung for three minutes: “Hey!”
Even Texas A&M alums can memorize it.

Food

— While watching a game, angel hair pasta tossed in olive oil and roasted garlic is a no-no. Doritos with a side of melted cheese product and a box of Krispy Kremes is as gourmet as it gets. We had a friend’s boyfriend come to a football party last year bearing oranges (it gets worse–they were seedless mandarins called “cuties.”) “You do not bring citrus fruit to a football party,” the boyfriend was told by his partner in a tone that resembled John Madden channeling Martha Stewart.

–Beer is the beverage of choice and it should to be a good, old, red-blooded American mass-produced brew like Bud or Miller. If you go micro, avoid foo-foo names like “Sweet Lavender Ale,” and choose “Snarling Pit Bull Malt” instead.

Interior Design

–A satellite dish with Tivo that can pick up the NFL Sunday Ticket and ESPN Classic Sports is de rigueur.

–You need a couch that’s functional, great to lounge on and the right color to hide beer and grease stains. Brushed leather won’t do.

–The kitchen should be within good hearing distance of the TV so you can’t miss a play. Better yet, go for a TV in the kitchen. And the bedroom. One fanatic we know (an ex-NFL player) has TV speakers in his bathroom so as not to miss a thing (how weird to listen to the Steelers going for 2 when you’re doing the same.)

–Contrary to what one friend’s partner thinks, a football trophy is a proper coffee table addition. Talk about a conversation piece!

Fashion/Grooming

–Avoid inappropriate combinations. A Yankees hat with a Red Sox sweatshirt; a Florida State visor with a Florida T-shirt; anything with “Los Angeles Clippers” on it. Would you wear your dad’s leisure suit to happy hour at the Boom-Boom Room? We didn’t think so.

–It is OK to go shirtless to a sporting event. But you first must be willing to paint “Hi mom! Go Huskers!” on your chest. Please do us a favor, though–before you bare all, at least have seen the inside of a gym in the past year.

–Tattoos are cool but must be appropriate. We have a good friend who’s a huge Minnesota Vikings fan, and he has a tat of the fierce Viking mascot on his behind. In the old days (before he found Mr. Right), he would go up to a prospective trick and if the guy knew anything about football, would say the Pickup Line That Never Failed: “Would you like to go somewhere private and see my royal Viking ass?” Try that with a tat of Madonna.

–Yes, many athletes wear jockstraps during competition, hence their name. And yes, people notice. Denver Broncos wide receiver Ed McCaffrey (all 6-5, 215 pounds of him) and his wife were once interviewed. The questioner noted that Ed wears undersized shoulder pads and mentioned he must also wear a jock strap. The wife said the jock “is a very large one. That’s why the shoulder pads look so small.” And this was on ESPN, not the Spice Channel.

By J. Buzinski Out Sports – 2003