Protecting Gay & Lesbian Families

No issue generates more controversy or passionate debate than the battle over whether gay and lesbian families should have the same protections as other families. It’s important to look beyond the rhetoric to examine reality. Gay and lesbian families deserve and need the same rights, benefits, and responsibilities as all other families.

It is important to differentiate between a civil marriage and a religious marriage. Let us be very clear, we are fighting only for civil protections, nothing more, nothing less. We do not want to infringe on a religion’s imperative and traditions. Any religion should be able to define marriage however it wishes. Enacting civil marriage for gays and lesbians will not force the Roman Catholic Church, the Southern Baptist Convention, the Orthodox Jewish religion or any other denomination to recognize gay and lesbian relationships. Some religions undoubtedly will choose to bless and recognize these loving unions. However, i respect the importance of religious freedom and believe each church should be able to decide this issue without government interference.

Gay and lesbians will not achieve total equality until we our families have the same protections as every other family. As long as the government can discriminate against our relationships, we are not equal. Many heterosexual couples take these things for granted, but gay and lesbian families live everyday without these basic guarantees.

Here are some of the more than 1,100 rights and benefits not given to gay and lesbian families.

We do not have the right to visit a sick partner in the hospital.
We do not have the right to make medical decisions for our partners should they become incapacitated.
We do not have the right to take time off from work to deal with our partner’s personal or medial emergency.
In many countries, joint adoptions are not allowed. That means only one parent has official custody of a child. What happens to that child if their “official parent” gets sick or dies? The child’s ability to remain with their other parent becomes jeopardized.
Social security benefits are not passed from one partner to another. In a heterosexual marriage, when someone dies, the surviving spouse receives their social security benefits. Not so for gay and lesbian couples. They pay into a system that does not protect their partner if they die.
If a gay or lesbian person gets health insurance benefits from their partner’s job, they must pay income tax on those benefits. For a married couple, there is no such tax.
If a gay or lesbian person unexpectedly dies without a will, their partner has no inheritance rights.

This list could go on and on. By itself, each item might not seem like a big deal. But taken together, the list of benefits and responsibilities provide important protection for families. Failing to provide gay and lesbian families with those same guarantees is unjust and unwise—creating instability and worry for many families.

Some interesting revelations become clear when you examine the poll numbers associated with this issue. No matter what the numbers say about support or opposition to gay marriage, ask the questions more precisely and you get consistent support for fairness and equality. Should gay and lesbians have the right to visit their partner in the hospital? Should they receive a partner’s social security benefits? Should a gay couple get the same tax benefits as a married couple? Overwhelmingly, polls show answer, “Yes!” to these questions. They understand this is an issue of fairness.

In recent years, public opinion polls have demonstrated steady and increasing support to recognize and protect our families. I confident, over time, more will understand why our families need the same protections and support as their families. As more of us come out to our families and friends, people are able to put a face with an abstract issue. They ask, why shouldn’t my brother be able to marry the man he loves? Why shouldn’t my daughter be able to adopt her child? Why shouldn’t my friend be able to visit his partner in the hospital? As more see their loved ones facing discrimination, they understand the importance of providing civil marriage equality. People are promised the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. That phrase loses its meaning if a person does not have a right to marry the one they love.

Lesbian Fiction Books to Read!

A small selection from stock which includes a huge range of lesbian fiction of all types.

The Others – Siba Al-Harez
A best-seller in Arabic. The Others is a literary tour de force, offering a glimpse into one of the most repressive societies in the world. Siba al-Harez tells the story of a nameless teenager at a girls’ school in the heavily Shi’ite Eastern Province of Saudi Arabia. Like her classmates, she has no contact with men outside her family. When the glamorous Dai tries to seduce her, her feelings of guilt are overcome by an overwhelming desire for sexual and emotional intimacy. Dai introduces her to a secret world of lesbian parties, online flirtations and hotel liaisons – a world in which the thrill of infatuation and the shame of obsession are deeply interwined. Al-Harez’s erotic, dreamlike story of looming personal crisis is a remarkable portrait of hidden lives.

“A rare window into young, lesbian Saudi culture…The protagonist’s journey of self-discovery [has] universal appeal.” Kirkus Reviews

The True Deceiver – Tove Jansson
In the deep winter snows of a Swedish hamlet, a strange young woman fakes a break-in at the house of an elderly artist in order to persuade her that she needs companionship. But what does she hope to gain by doing this? And who ultimately is deceiving whom? In this portrayal of two women grappling with truth and lies, nothing can be taken for granted. By the time the snow thaws, both their lives will have changed irrevocably.

‘The True Deceiver glitters with the kind of sharpness that might just cut you…It is one of Jansson’s most deceptively quiet, most astonishing compositions.’ Ali Smith.

Girl Meets Boy – Ali Smith
Girl meets boy. It’s a story as old as time. But what happens when an old story meets a brand new set of circumstances? Ali Smith’s re-mix of Ovid’s most joyful myth is a story about the kind of fluidity that can’t be bottled and sold. It’s about girls and boys, girls and girls, love and transformation, a story of puns and doubles, reversals and revelations. Funny and fresh, poetic and political, here is a tale of change for the modern world.

“Girl meets boy pulls you in and doesn’t let you go. Never afraid of big ideas, morality or politics, Smith’s retelling is bold and brilliant – containg the best sexI’ve read in years.” Jackie Kay

The Teahouse Fire – Ellis Avery
A spellbinding tale of love and turmoil in nineteenth century Japan. When Aurelia flees the fire that kills her missionary uncle and leaves her an orphan, she knows but a few words of Japanese. She hides in a teahouse and is adopted by the family who own it: gradually falling in love with both the tea ceremony and with her young mistress, Yukako. As she grows up, Aurelia remains devoted to the family through its failing fortunes and to Yukako, although her love will never be reciprocated. As civil war and western intervention change Japan and tensions in the house gradually mount, Aurelia begins to realise that, to the world around her, she will never be anything but an outsider.

Disobedience – Naomi Alderman
Ronit has left London and transformed her life. She has become a cigarette-smoking, wisecracking, New York career woman, who is in love with a maried man. But when Ronit’s father dies she is called back into the very difficult world of her childhood, a world she thought she had left far behind. The orthodox Jewish suburb of Hendon, north London is outraged by Ronit and her provocative ways. But Ronit is shocked too by the confrontation with her past. And when she meets up with her childhood girlfriend Esti, she is forced to think again about what she has left behind. As read on Radio 4. Winner of the Orange Award for New Writers 2006.

‘Rich, fresh, fascinating. A wonderful novel.’ Sunday Times

Wish I was Here – Jackie Kay
This fierce, funny and compassionate collection of stories explores every facet of that most overwhelming and complicated of human emotions: love. With winning directness, Jackie Kay captures her characters’ greatest joy and greatest vulnerability, exposing the moments of tenderness, of shock, of bravery and of stupidity that accompany the search for love, the discovery of love and, most of all, love’s loss.

“So immediately engaging that it reads as though she is speaking to you at a bus stop.” Irish Times

Behind the Pine Curtain – Gerri Hill
Ostracized from her hometown and banished from her family at the age of seventeen because she is gay, Jaqueline Keys hitch-hikes to Los Angeles and work nights to put herself through college. Now fifteen years later – long after she’s written her first best-selling book No Place For Family- Jackie is persuaded to return to the tiny town of Pine Springs after her father’s death. The quick trip she’d envisioned turns into weeks as she learns that her father’s business is suddenly hers to manage. And soon she is face-to-face with Kay, the woman who had been Jackie’s very first crush all those years ago. It doesn’t take long for them to fall back into their old habits, and soon Jackie is fighting off the same feelings she had struggled with as a teen. Gerri Hill is the best-selling author of Artist’s Dream, Dawn of Change, Gulf Breeze, Hunter’s Way, The Killing Room and Sierra City.

Wild Dogs – Helen Humphreys
Every evening, Alice and five others gather at the forest’s edge, trying to call back their dogs, abandoned by others in their lives. Becoming more involved in the group, Alice moves to a cabin owned by Malcolm, whose motives in having her there are suspicious. As she falls for the wildlife biologist whose wolf has gained lead of the pack, she feels the tug between love’s wild power and her desire to domesticate it. After a tragic accident, all must rethink thier lives and find their places in an untamed world. Wild Dogs is the co-winner of the 2005 Lambda Literary Award for Fiction.

“A sensual, romantic, and brutally wise novel that will leave readers gasping. Every senstence Humphreys writes is a blow to the heart.” Emma Donoghue, author of Life Mask.

Sleep With Me – Joanna Briscoe
Richard and Lelia’s child is conceived in a moment of giggling chaos as they dress for a Christmas party. They arrive rudely late and still glowing, and barely register a slight, drab woman in the hall. Sylvie. As their baby grows, so does the presence of Sylvie – she seems to be nowhere, yet everywhere, harmless yet sinister. Richard is seduced by her subtle, inexplicable charm, while Lelia, struggling with Richard’s sudden ambivalence towards their baby, finds that she is haunted by painful memories. And Sylvie remains as invisible as she wants to be – that is the source of her power.

“Elegiac, beautiful, evocative…Sleep With Me works in much the same way as an obsession…you may wish to escape, but have already become addicted.” Anita Sethi, Daily Telegraph.

The Iron Girl – Ellen Hart
After years spent mourning the death of her partner, Christine Kane, Minneapolis restaurateur Jane Lawless thinks she’s ready to move on. That is, until she finds a gun amoung Christine’s belongings. The night before Christine died of cancer, three members of the Simoneau family, Christine’s real estate clients, were murdered. The timing of their deaths appeared coincidental and Jane always assumed Christine knew nothing about the family’s secrets. But as she searches for clues to understand what really happened, the gun and a few other discoveries begin to convince Jane otherwise. Where past and present collide, Ellen Hart’s latest mystery in this Lambda and Minnesota Book Award winning series proves that she remains one of the genre’s greatest.

Idaho Code – Joan Opyr
Burned by love gone wrong, Bil leaves college in Seattle and returns to Cowslip, Idaho, population 23,000. It ought to be the perfect place to lick her wounds but unfortunately Bil’s terminally ill brother has embarked on a petty crime spree, Cowslip has become ground zero in the battle over an anti-gay initiative and it looks as if Bil’s mother might have been involved in a long ago murder. This is where family therapy comes with a shovel and an alibi.

Alchemy – Maureen Duffy
A compelling mystery combining the witch trials of the past with a contemporary case of academic intrigue. Solicitor Jade Green’s life takes a turn for the bizarre when she accepts an unusual case – that of a university professor accused of Satanism. As Jade delves into the strange circumstances of his dismissal, she finds herself drawn into a seventeenth-century manuscript, the original of which has been stolen from the Professor’s briefcase at the university. It is the diary of Amyntas Boston, a young woman awaiting trial for dabbling in the black arts. The two stories intertwine as Jade fells mysterious echoes of the trial in her own life, and resonances of Amyntas’ experience four hundred years before. Well written and a popular favourite.

‘A novel that bristles with ideas.’Sunday Times

Deftly handeld the movement between two worlds, four centuries apart. Her range of cultural reference is dazzling.’Literary Review.

Night Call – Radclyffe
All medevac helicopter pilot Jett McNally wants to do is fly and forget about the horror and heartbreak she left behind in the Middle East, but anesthesiologist Tristan Holmes has other plans. When Jett comes home from the war in the Middle East, flying and the adrenaline rush of crisis are the only things that make her happy, and she volunteers to fly night call where all the action is whenever she can. So maybe once in a while she takes a few chances. Hey, that’s life, right? Dr. Tristan Holmes is an expert at two things – high-risk anesthesia and pleasing women. Tristan gave up expecting anything other than a good time from the women in her life a long time ago, and casual relationships are the perfect prescription for stress release. She doesn’t do relationships, so she can’t quite understand why it bothers her when Jett makes it clear she doesn’t want one. High-stakes medical drama, life on the edge, and love in the fast lane.

Radclyffe’s excellent and gripping novels can prove very hard to get hold of, so that’s why Gay’s the Word import and stocks her whole back catalogue.

Radclyffe, author of over thirty novels, is the recipient of the 2004 Alice B. Award for a career “distinguished by consistently well-written, realistic, and inspirational novels.”

Babyji – Abha Dawesar
Sexy, surprising, and subversively wise, Babyji is the story of Anamika Sharma, a spirited student growing up in Delhi. At school she is an ace at quantum physiscs. At home she sneaks off to her parent’s scooter garage to read the Kamasutra. Before long she has seduced an elegant older divorcee and the family servant and has caught the eye of a classmate coveted by all the boys. With the world of adulthood dancing before her, Anamika confronts questions that would test someone twice her age. Ebullient, unfettered, and introducing one of the most charming heroines in contemporary fiction, Babyji is irresistible.

“I loved Babyji. It’s a cunning lithe defiant sexy tiger’s roar of a book.” Ali Smith, author of Hotel World.

EverAfter – Sandra Freeman
Ever After is a historical lesbian novel about love’s ferocity, secrets and joys. A sequel to the intelligent and gratifying The Other Side, set in Paris following W.W.I, we re-encounter Charlie (aka Charlotte) and Anna as they deal with fidelity, desire and sex between women; a subject not ripe for discussion in ‘polite society’. The war may be over but life for these women proves far from peaceful.

Lost Daughters – J.M. Redmann
The eagerly awaitied fourth Micky Knight mystery. Micky is the fearless, fast-moving New Orleans private dick with a difference. She’s on two cases: a widowed mother is searching for her estranged daughter, and an adopted young drag queen, who was thrown out of his home for being queer, searches for his mother. This all leads Micky to the question of her own mother, who split when she was five. In this latest adventure Micky is still a deliciously complicated and contradictory character. An absorbing and gratifying read.

The Dawn of Change – Gerri Hill
Susan Sterling wanted nothing more than to escape her life…and her marriage. The family’s secluded cabin in King’s Canyon National Park seemed the only place for her to find peace. But it took Shawn Weber coming into her life for her to find the courage to make changes. The budding friendship between the two women strenghtens into an intense emotional bond, a bond that soon eclipses friendship. Despite pressure from her family to reconcile with her husband, Susan can’t deny the feelings that Shawn stirs within her. But will Susan forsake her entire family for a chance of love with Shawn? Intensely engrossing and deliciously readable.

Fun Home, A Family Tragicomic – Alison Bechdel
A fresh and brilliantly told comic-book memoir from a cult favourite, marked by gothic twists, a family funeral home, sexual angst, and great books. Meet Alison’s father, a third-generation funeral home director, a high school teacher, an icily distant parent, and a closeted homosexual who, as it turns out, is involved with his male students and a family babysitter. Through narrative that is heartbreaking and fiercely funny, we are drawn into a daughter’s complex yearning for her father. When Alison comes out as gay herself in late adolescence, the denouement is swift, graphic – and redemptive. Bechdel is the hugely insightful and talented author of the ever-popular Dykes to Watch Out For series.

The list was compiled from Gay’s The Word Lesbian & Gay Bookshop.
Gay’s The Word is the UK’s pioneering first lesbian and gay bookshop. Established in 1979 and had located in the historic Bloomsbury district of London.

Telling Your Family That You’re Gay

Before you think about how to come out to your family, what’s most important is that you feel a sense of acceptance in yourself about your sexual orientation and/or gender identity and your reasons for coming out. As you begin to acknowledge to yourself that you are lesbian, gay, bisexual or trans, it is very common to experience guilt, shame, doubt and confusion.

The effects of a lifetime of negative social messages, discrimination and, for some, violence cannot be erased overnight. This can be a difficult time and it can be helpful to talk to a counsellor or friend to help prepare you emotionally to come out. Involvement in a local coming out group may also help you with your own process.

Even in a climate where the LGBTI community has begun to fight back and demand rights, recognition and protection under the law, social attitudes and belief systems continue to discriminate. Although social attitudes such as homophobia and transphobia affect all of us, many members of the LGBTI community confront other forms of discrimination as well, such as racism, ageism, sexism, etc. All or some of these social attitudes may influence your coming out experience.

Although homophobia and transphobia exist in all cultures, the degree of acceptance of LGBTI identities varies across cultural and religious communities. For some of us, the loss of family and/or membership in our cultural community, silence, hostility or even violence are very real consequences to coming out. If this is your reality, you need to realistically assess the risks involved. If you decide to come out, but are concerned about your family’s reaction, you should work with a counsellor or friend to develop a plan that will ensure your safety.

Family reactions

As you begin to feel the first inklings of pride and entitlement to be who you are, you can’t help feeling that family, friends and the rest of the heterosexual world will see you as different. One of the things we know is that prejudice and discrimination do change over time and it is usually exposure to that which is different that helps to change negative attitudes. When it comes to family members and in particular parents finding out they have a LGBTI child, it is those historically negative ideas about homosexuality that first concern them.

Some thoughts that cross many parents’ minds include:

“If being gay is sick, perverted and unnatural, and my child says they’re gay, I must have been a bad parent.”

“Lesbians are treated badly in employment and housing situations and lead isolated lonely lives outside the mainstream. I don’t want my child to suffer.”

“Being trans is seen as sick and perverted by many people. How will other family, friends and work mates see me if my child is trans?”

Dealing with cultural issues

If you have strong ties to a particular cultural community, your parents may be concerned with how your coming out will be perceived by the community and how it will affect their position within it. Many individuals report that cultural values, such as not talking about or displaying emotions, get in the way of them sharing their sexual orientation or gender identity with their parents. In many cultural communities, being LGBTI is considered to be a North American problem, thus the preferred response to your coming out may be to deny your reality and to become more strict about having you conform to cultural norms and expectations. Coming out may also feel like you need to choose between your cultural identity and your sexual orientation. This is even more difficult when you experience the LGBTI community as being insensitive to your cultural identity. There are groups and associations for LGBTI individuals from specific cultural communities. They can help you find culturally appropriate information, images and supports for you and your family.

If you are coming out as trans

Although years of activism have improved the lives of many members of the LGBTI community, trans individuals are still the focus of much discrimination and violence. If you are coming out to your parents as trans, you may face challenges relating to the lack of information and positive images that are available regarding trans folks, particularly individuals from specific cultural communities. The lack of information available about trans people and their experiences is directly related to the confusion and hostility that many parents may feel when their child comes out as trans. Trans identities also lead to confusion regarding the issue of sexual orientation, so your parents may wonder whether your new gender identity also means that you are gay or lesbian. Transphobia can combine with homophobia to make coming out a very challenging and anxiety-provoking experience.

Consult the list of resources on this website for books and articles that can help you come out to your parents, as well as the list of links that we have provided for trans positive services and web sites.

Most parents want the best for their children and if they know that what’s best is to be true to yourself and live who you are, they will gradually come to accept, not only that they have a gay, lesbian, bisexual or trans child and that it wasn’t their fault, but that their child will live a fulfilling life.

Before you tell your family

Before you tell them, you need personal time to come to terms with your new self-understanding. It’s also helpful to have support from others who have gone through this process. Keep in mind there is likely at least one other gay, lesbian or bisexual person in your family tree, either from previous generations or who is currently alive. One of the fun aspects of coming out to yourself is going over your family tree and identifying those who may have been LGBTI. This is often not the case for trans folks as they are still fighting for the right to live out and proud.

With your new awareness you may discover there were clues all along that you didn’t recognize because of secrecy and shame. We often hear from individuals, struggling with coming out to their family, that they fear the news will “kill” their parents. Although it may be difficult in the beginning and your parents and family may initially reject you , most, particularly those who had a good relationship with their children, accept the news over time.

Many people who’ve come out also find that their relationship with their parents eventually improves because of the increased openness and honesty that comes with sharing this knowledge. Many also experience a great sense of relief in knowing that they no longer need to keep their true identity a secret.

It is important that you communicate to your parents that you love them, are not trying to hurt them and that, whether you are coming out as gay, lesbian, bisexual or trans, you are still the same person that they love. Consider sharing with them your story of coming out to yourself, as well as the resources that you found helpful during this time. This may include books, films, friends, allies, and counselors. Above all, be patient. Recall how long it took for you to come to terms with your new identity and give your parents the time to do the same.

There are many ways you can tell your family:

The most common first step for many LGBTI is to confide in a sibling (if you have one), cousin, uncle or aunt; one who you feel will accept and support you in telling other family members.
When you’re ready to tell your parents, you might want to start with the parent to whom you feel the closest.
Instead of telling them in person, another option is to write your parents a letter. This gives your parents time to reflect on what you have told them and decide how to respond.
When you meet with your parents, either after you’ve sent a letter, or to tell them for the first time, you might want to consider bringing along a supportive friend or family member.

Saying Goodbye To Lesbian Bed Death

Sometimes when a couple has been together for a long time, sex isn’t the main priority for them, or one person in the relationship isn’t as into it. Regarding lesbian relationships, this has been called “Lesbian Bed Death” (LBD).

Just like any other type of couple, a lesbian couple might find that they’re not as passionate as they were when they first met. Even though this a common occurrence for those who’ve been together long-term, it is a hot topic in the LGBTI+ community. This issue can be worked on if both partners in the relationship are willing to give it a shot. Read on for some ideas you can use to spice up your sex life and put LBD behind you.

Reintroduce romance to the relationship
It’s easy enough to take your partner for granted when you’ve been together for awhile. You’re both most likely very busy, juggling work and family life. See what happens when you start to surprise your partner with tickets to a movie they want to see or some flowers. Whatever you know will make them smile.

Spend some time on your own
Have your own life and social circle. Maybe take up a new hobby or join a group with similar interests. A little time away from each other now and then will make you appreciate each other more.

Go ahead and have sex
There’s always an excuse to not have time for something that seems like a luxury. Sex is an important part of an intimate relationship. Make it a priority and set aside time for quick, but passionate lovemaking during a break at work, or go on a mini vacation to a hotel, even near home.

Show affection toward each other
When you’re not being loving and affectionate (touching, cuddling, kissing, etc.), you might as well be housemates. Long-term relationships need love and attention. Remember why you were so excited about your partner in the first place and go from there.

Real Reasons That Gay Parents Are Amazing

Scientific evidence shows that children of gay parents are being raised very well.

The American Academy of Pediatrics announced its approval of same sex marriage and said: “Children thrive in families that are stable and that provide permanent security, and the way we do that is through marriage.”

Benjamin Siegel, who co-authored the policy statement, said in a statement. “The AAP believes there should be equal opportunity for every couple to access the economic stability and federal supports provided to married couples to raise children.” Here are some reasons that gay parents are doing an excellent job:

They intentionally have kids.

The frequent unplanned pregnancies are not in the mix with same-sex couples. It’s not to say that anyone who doesn’t have a child in a planned way is doing a bad job. But, when gay couples plan to have children they tend to be more attentive, passionate and motivated about raising their children.

They care for the neediest children.

Some of the neediest children up for adoption are saved by gay parents who look for them. It has been found that 60 percent of lesbian and gay parents who adopt do so across races. This makes it possible for minority children to get out of the system when it’s often so difficult for them to be wanted by those looking to adopt. Gay parents also go for older children. When kids are older than 3, it is much more difficult for them to be adopted. A majority of those adopted are special needs children.

They encourage tolerance.

Many who were raised by lesbian and gay parents say that they learned empathy and open-mindedness from their parents. They were not taught to stereotype genders and felt that they were more accepting and tolerant of others because of their upbringing.

Their kids do well academically.

A review of research on same-sex parents and their kids from 2010 reported that GPAs were up to par with kids of heterosexual couples. One study showed that boys of lesbian parents had a higher average GPA (2.9) compared to heterosexual parents (2.65). Teen girls of lesbian moms scored (2.8) compared to those with heterosexual parents with an average (2.9) GPA.

They raise confident kids.

Being raised in an environment with gay or lesbian parents can bring about confidence in kids. A study involving lesbian mothers with or without partners who intentionally had kids, not bringing them in to the family from a previous heterosexual relationship, showed that they raised more confident kids than heterosexual parents. This is most likely because of more involvement in their children’s lives.

Harmful Myths About Lesbian Partner Violence

Domestic violence happens in every type of relationship

Crisis line counselors are sometimes warned to be extra vigilant when they screen those seeking safety from domestic violence because, in the case of lesbian relationships, some pretend to be victims in order to be admitted into a shelter to access their partner. Turning a blind eye to domestic violence in lesbian relationships tells abusers they can get away with it…because they do. Here are some myths about same sex partner violence in lesbian relationships that need to come out in the open:

Because there are two women in the partnership they must have equal power.

People have skewed ideas about how different people of one sex can be–women in particular. There are women who are very capable of using incredible strength to cause great physical harm to their partner–biting, punching, kicking…all of it. Homicides and serious injury do occur. Not all women are nurturing. In fact, in a survey that included over 1,100 lesbians, more than half said they were abused by a same sex partner at some point in their life. And, up to 50 percent of lesbians have reported sexual abuse.

Sexual abuse doesn’t exist in lesbian partnerships.

Unfortunately, people tend not to believe that sexual abuse happens in lesbian relationships. When they think of this type of abuse, there is an idea that forced penetration with a penis must be involved. This is completely false. Emotional abuse with coercion and threats often occur in lesbian relationships, which forces one woman to submit. Threatening to “out” a partner is common as is humiliation in general. One woman can very well dominate another in a violent manner and sexually abuse the other, despite common beliefs to the contrary.

Lesbians and heterosexuals are equally as challenged after leaving an abusive relationship.

Although leaving an abusive relationship is difficult for anyone, lesbians face some specific challenges that heterosexuals don’t. Many lesbians do not seek assistance because they fear a homophobic response. Others are ashamed of their own sexuality due to messages they received growing up. Lesbians often don’t feel like they can be themselves much less risk being rejected when they seek help. Sometimes they’re not out to their families and abusers take advantage of this fact to further isolate them, perpetuating dependence.

Butch lesbians are the only ones who are abusive.

A woman doesn’t have to identify as butch or have any typically masculine traits whatsoever to be an abusive person. Not every lesbian relationship is butch/femme. A feminine lesbian who is an abuser can use this false assumption to her advantage. She might threaten to call the police when she’s not the one who is actually the victim. Sadly, law enforcement sometimes falls for this when the partner being blamed looks more masculine.

Sexual Safety During Pregnancy Possible For Lesbians Too

Worrying about the safety of sexual activity is not something limited to heterosexual couples. Many lesbian couples worry, too. Thankfully, there’s generally no reason to avoid intimacy when you’re expecting. However, there may be certain activities your doctor will advise you to avoid if you are considered a high-risk pregnancy.

Pregnant lesbians may find the topic of sex to be a touchy subject. During pregnancy some women experience heightened senses and an increased libido, while others lack sexual desire completely. Some have partners who are afraid of injuring the baby and, as a result, put any sexual feelings on the back burner. It’s important to keep in mind, though, that most pregnant women want to be intimate and many want to participate in sexual activity.

Even if genital sex is not desired, there are other ways to go about creating intimacy such as massage, kissing, and touching. The majority of types of lesbian sexual activity, including light penetration, is safe for most pregnant women. However, it’s important to stay away from certain activities such as rough S&M, deep thrusting, or fisting. Do not continue any sexual activity that triggers any discomfort. Avoiding sex toys such as vibrators, dildos and strap-ons are suggested since there’s difficulty in knowing where they’re touching exactly.

During pregnancy, it’s important to take time for yourselves. Otherwise, you’ll find that you won’t naturally have that emotional energy. Take time to get together with friends and family. This is especially important if you’re a single pregnant woman, finding that you’re isolated from most of the lesbian community during this time. Perhaps you’ll even find it worth considering to give yourself a spa day.

And, if you are in a partnership, include your loved one for the spa day. You needn’t even visit a spa. Stay home, give each other massages, have a special dinner together, and even a gigantic dessert. Why not? At least once in awhile.

This is not an easy time for couples, in general, but it can still have more ups than downs. You can both keep your relationship fresh, especially when remembering that you’re going to have to take it more slowly than usual. You might have actual sex less, but find that you’ll become more intimate with your partner in ways that you never imagined.

5 Ways Bisexual Women Can Pursue Better Healthcare

Many individuals in the LGBT+ community face significant issues with regard to health care. For example, bisexual women face a high risk of physical and mental health problems and have a higher likelihood of experiencing violence and addiction. Discrimination is often experienced within the healthcare system. The bisexual community is fighting this, to spread education and make quality healthcare more accessible.

There are some general guidelines that may be helpful for bisexual women who are looking for quality health care. Read on to learn the five ways bisexual women can take care of their health, even while facing exceptional challenges.

Be aware of risks
Bisexual women are more likely to experience addiction, smoke, have depression and have suicidal thoughts and/or attempts, compared to other groups. Bi woman are also at a higher risk for cancer than heterosexual women or lesbians and less likely to get screening. Amy André, a co-author of Bisexual Health: An Introduction said, “Research shows that bisexuals experience more discrimination, violence, and stigma than gays and lesbians.” She believes that the fact that bisexuals have the worst health is directly linked to the violence, stigma and discrimination.

Seek quality health care
Unfortunately, it’s not possible to assume that every doctor is able to cater to the unique needs of LGBT+ patients. It is easier in urban areas, but still more difficult to find a provider that doesn’t group bisexual patients with gay or straight women. There is a list of providers in the Gay and Lesbian Medical Association directory and the Bisexual-Aware Professionals Directory. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect and compassion.

Be your own advocate
You’ll need to be more assertive at times because some doctors will ask questions that are heteronormative. If you find that the doctor assumes you are a sexuality that you aren’t, you may need to answer broadly. You’ll want to make sure that you’re giving proper information about your past and current partners, and your sexuality. Some women will find it more difficult if they live in a small community with few doctors. Push yourself as far as you feel comfortable and remember that you can request certain types of screening for your physical and mental health.

Know your financial barriers
According to LGBT+ MAP’s Unfair Price study, bi women are more than twice as likely to live in poverty than the general population, and 29% of LGBT+ women have trouble finding affordable health care, compared to 19% of heterosexual women. Women in rural areas may experience even more difficulty. It’s of vital importance to have access to affordable health care. This could mean a visit to a free clinic, Planned Parenthood or a doctor’s office that takes your health insurance.

Get the word out
Form a support system and be supportive to others in a similar position. Doing this not only positively affects your chances of receiving affordable health care, it improves your health.

Lesbian and Bisexual Women’s Health

There is so much health information available online geared toward lesbian health. How does lesbian or bisexual health differ from that of heterosexual women? It doesn’t. Women who identify as lesbians and bisexuals are prone to the same sexually transmitted infections, urinary tract infections, and yeast infections as women who identify as heterosexual. That said, it is important to note that lesbian and bisexual women do face significantly different issues within health care, such as discrimination and uninformed medical practitioners.

As sexual orientation doesn’t affect a woman’s health, it is reasonable to then look into risk factors and common illnesses for women in general. The number one cause of death for women is heart disease. There are several risk factors that contribute to the likelihood of developing heart disease. While age, race, and genetics are not within your control, obesity and smoking are. Such lifestyle choices make a significant difference when it comes to long-term health, particularly in the prevention and treatment of heart disease.

The second most common cause of death amongst women is cancer of the breast, lung, colon, uterus, and ovaries. This is one case that research shows a significant increase in rates for lesbian or bisexual women. While research is still being conducted, it is believed that breast and ovarian cancers are related to hormone levels. It is thought that full-term pregnancies and breastfeeding release hormones that may protect women against such cancers. As lesbian and bisexual women are less likely to have a full-term pregnancy, they may be at greater risk of developing such cancers.

Of course, the greatest risk for all women is to delay check-ups and exams. It is most important to find a physician that you are comfortable meeting with regularly and speaking with openly. Women should go in for full examinations at least once a year – reach out to a medical provider and make an appointment today!

Tips for Lesbians Seeking a Love Life Boost

Do you feel a little bored with your life? Or, maybe even feel like it’s a chore? That’s not what anyone wants when it comes to sex. It’s okay. It’s normal to go through periods of time when you’re somewhat stuck and need to put a little more effort into spicing things up.

Spend time together
It’s wise not to assume things will work out on their own. You need to put some effort into creating a more satisfying love life. Mark your calendar and set aside an entire day for the two of you to explore each other completely — mind and body. Both of you may be pleasantly surprised about what you discover.

Kiss for awhile
Why don’t both of you spend a lot more time kissing, without worrying about doing anything else? Often, lovers spend a lot of time thinking about the end result. You may find that if you spend time kissing, you’ll become much more intimate and sex will be phenomenal.

Don’t become too comfortable
You and your lover need not become victims of lesbian bed death. Make sure to spend some time away from each other once in a while; make your own friends, and just socialize. A little bit of time away from each other will make you both appreciate one another that much more. Of course, this appreciation and excitement will extend to the bedroom.

Buy some toys
Even the thought alone and the decision to purchase a good toy is exciting. If you’re both inexperienced, check out some websites that sell adult toys, and communicate about what turns you on. Maybe start with a dildo, which is pretty versatile. If you decide you want to go all out and use a strap-on for sex, do that, too. It’s your choice, and that can be arousing on its own.

Pick out a good lube
This is important to use on your sex toys, but also in general. It can be rubbed in all sorts of sexy places and is even more arousing if you choose one with stimulant properties.

Massage
Incorporate some massage into your love life. Make sure to explore every inch of your lover’s body. Using lotions and oil makes it that much better. You may discover new places you both like to be touched.

Dress up/Role play
You might decide to go for some power playing if you’re in a respectful, trusting relationship. This may strengthen your trust towards each other. One person playing the dominating role can be incredibly arousing. You may also choose to use costumes and uniforms. Invite a light-hearted sense of humor to set the mood. Laughing together can be sexy…and maybe you’ve always been turned on by a woman in uniform–here’s your chance to make that happen.

Common Myths About Lesbians

Are you a lesbian tired of hearing myths about who you are and what you do?

Or, are you just curious and want to dig beneath the surface for some truth? Either way, it’s important to clear up some common misconceptions every once in awhile. Some of them can be quite damaging. Let’s look at some of the more frequent myths:

Lesbians are man-haters
This isn’t true at all. In fact, there are lesbians who love men. They have long-term friendships with men and might have a man who’s a best friend to them. It’s confusing that this myth is popular at all because it doesn’t make logical sense.

Butch lesbians really want to be men
It’s true that we all express ourselves in different ways and sometimes it happens that women wear clothing or their hair in styles that are more traditionally masculine. It does not follow that women want to be another gender. Those looking to change their sex are transsexual. Sometimes clothing style has little to do with expression and more to do with comfort.

You must sleep with a woman before you know you’re a lesbian
If heterosexuals can know they’re attracted to someone else before sex, the same applies to lesbians, or anyone else for that matter.

If you’re a lesbian this means you’re attracted to all women
Bogus. This is a myth where anyone’s concerned. Apply it to yourself. Are you attracted to everyone of a specific group?

Being a lesbian is a choice
There have been numerous types of therapies attempting to get people to “become” straight that are not only ineffective, but downright damaging. Studies have shown that sexual orientation isn’t chosen and that it’s an inborn trait.

Lesbians relationships are about sex
Not true. Lesbian relationships are often multi-faceted, involving families and emotional connections as well as sex.

Lesbians just haven’t found ‘the right man’
If anything, many lesbians haven’t found the right woman yet. Just as in any type of relationship, it takes some time to find the right partner. Lesbians aren’t interested in finding the right man because they’re attracted to women. It seems simple enough, but a lot of people find that difficult to swallow.

You know a lesbian when you see her
You might, in fact, have a decent intuition or “gaydar”, but this is not something that can be measured in any definite way just by looking at someone.

One partner plays “the man” in a lesbian relationship
Sometimes the dynamics of a same sex relationship make it seem easier to assume that male/female roles are being played, but it’s not the case. There are a lot of different kinds of lesbian relationships, butch/femme being one, but that doesn’t mean that one person is pretending to be a man.

Lesbians can’t be religious or spiritual
There are some churches that are accepting of all humans, and spirituality is a subjective experience. Unfortunately, there are some denominations that would think lesbians are living in sin.

Lambda

The lambda was selected as a symbol by the Gay Activists Alliance of New York in 1970, following the Stonewall Riots, and was declared the international symbol for gay and lesbian rights by the International Gay Rights Congress in Edinburgh, Scotland, in 1974. The lambda signifies unity under oppression.

The Scottish Minorities Group hosted the first ever International Gay Rights Conference in Edinburgh from 18 to 22 December 1974. It was co-organised by Ian Dunn and Derek Ogg. Ian Dunn had organised the first meeting of what was to become the Scottish Minorities Group in 1969. Derek Ogg later founded Scottish AIDS Monitor in the 1980s.

The conference tried to provide an international sharing of experience, so that delegates could find out the social, political and legal situation for men and women from other countriesm, and included sessions on the rights of young homosexuals and of gay women. The problem of lesbian invisibility was explicitly addressed by a delegate from Campaign Against Moral Persecution in New South Wales, Australia.

Nearly 400 people attended the conference, which led in 1978 to the establishment of the International Gay Association, later to become the International Lesbian and Gay Association (ILGA).

The gay rights organization Lambda Legal and the American Lambda Literary Award derive their names from this symbol. Gay News offered a range of jewellery items featuring the Lambda symbol.

The Lesbian and Gay Miners’ Support Group

The Lesbian and Gay Miners’ Support Group were set up during the 1984-85 miners’ strike and challenged prejudices held by many in the labour movement.

by February 1985 there were eleven lesbians’ and gay men’s miners’ support groups all over the country. By December 1984 the London group alone had collected over £11,000 through pub, club and street collections, benefits, parties and other events. The highlight event was undoubtedly the ‘Pits and Perverts’ gig at the Electric Ballroom where Bronski Beat headed the bill; it raised £5,650.

The London group was the first to be set up in July 1984, and started with 11 members. Six months later it had grown to 50 members.

The Lothian Lesbian & Gay Miners Support Group was set up in September 1984 with 12 members raising £40 a week for the White Craige strike centre in East Lothian.

Lesbians Against Pit Closures followed in November 1984, involving more than 20 women who collected £50 a week for the Rhodisia Women’s Action Group, Worksop. The gay community’s support for the miners received much coverage in the left-wing and trade union press. The lesbians’ and gay men’s ‘fringe meeting’ at the October 1984 Labour Party conference was attended by about 250 people.

The recognition of gay rights issues by the union and Labour movements and the contacts forged during the miner’s strike between them and the gay movement led to the formation of a network of gay groups for the members of trade unions which continues to thrive. It also led to gay and lesbian issues being included in training courses for union representatives in the workplace, and the adoption of gay rights policies by the Labour Party.

Butch, Dyke, Femme or Lipstick Lesbian?

What Do They Mean and Where Do they Come From?

I’ve been caught out myself quite a few times. I’ve been hanging out with a group of lesbian friends in a bar, catching up on gossip and the latest on off relationships (much like the L Word), when someone surprises me with a term where I just haven’t got a clue what they are on about! I used to nod my head in failing agreement trying to hide the fact that I haven’t got the slightest inkling whether Jane who lives down the street is a Dieseldyke, or not!

It got to the point where I was too afraid to say much in case I made a fool of myself – so, instead of vegging out in front of the TV, I hit the web by storm and researched all the lesbian terms I possibly could so I would never fall into the same trap again. Now I consider myself to be pretty much on par with everyone else, but I thought I would make it easier for you womyn out there who aren’t quite up to scratch by publishing it all right here!

So here it is – my lesbian terms dictionary. I’ve even thrown in some of the origins of words so you can look extra clued up next time your buddies go out for coffee. I haven’t organized it alphabetically, but in groups of terms that have similar meanings.

Women Who Love Women

Boston Marriage
Definition: Old fashioned term describing two unmarried women who shared a house together.
Origins: This originates from the nineteenth century when it was acceptable for two unmarried women to share a house together. It is hard to say how many of these women were lesbians!

Lesbian
Definition: A gay woman. This is often shortened to les or lesbo.
Origins: This term was originally used for natives of the Greek island of Lesbos. An ancient poet called Sappho lived here and wrote many love sonnets to women or describing same sex relationships. It was first used as a term to describe a gay woman in the 1890’s.

Sapphism
Definition: Another term for lesbianism
Origins: Direct origination from the poet Sappho who wrote love sonnets to and about women.

Masculine Vs Feminine

Butch
Definition: Used to describe a lesbian who is masculine in appearance and outlook. Often relates to the way she dresses, the hairstyle, the shoes she wears etc.
Origins: There are conflicting stories as to where this term originated from. Some say it comes from 1930’s America from Butch, a strong and popular man’s name of that time. Others believe it stems from the 1950’s when both in the UK and USA working class lesbian couples dressed as one masculine and one feminine, whilst the middle class preferred to hide behind their feminine demeanor. Another important influence on Butch lesbians comes from the same period in lesbian bars where you were forced to dress Butch or Femme. Such distinction in dress is not as apparent nowadays but when you know someone that prefers power tools to cookery and dresses in comfy men’s clothes then she’s probably a Butch at heart.

Dyke
Definition: Another term for butch.
Origins: This may have originated from the Celtic language, or possibly from the slang word dike used in the nineteenth century which means male clothing. This term is widely accepted in lesbian circles but if a straight person were to call you a dyke this is thought to be offensive!

Bulldyke
Definition: Incredibly masculine lesbian.
Origins: This supports the theory that dyke originates from the Celtic language as Queen Boudicca was around at the time and she was known for being an incredibly powerful woman.

Dieseldyke
Definition: Once again this term means incredibly masculine lesbian, particularly those that drive heavy equipment and trucks.
Origins: Good old 1990’s slang!

Soft Butch
Definition: A lesbian that appears hard and masculine on the outside but has a soft heart! This is a relatively new term.

Baby Dyke
Definition: A young lesbian that’s coming out.

Femme
Definition: A lesbian who dresses in a feminine nature and has a feminine manner. Femmes are said to prefer skirts, flouncy clothes, makeup, and spending inconceivable amounts on their hair. They are the opposites of Butch.
Origins: This originates from the same time as Butch became popular in the 1950’s where lesbians were forced to choose which way they would dress in bars, or the working class lesbian couples chose to dress that way.

Lipstick Lesbian
Definition: Another term for Femme. However it can also mean feminine women who are attracted to other feminine women. It’s also used to describe women who pretend to be lesbians, just for personal gains. For example, where would the porn industry be without all those women who have sex with other women just for the money!
Origins: This is a slang term introduced in the late 1990’s.

Everything In-between!

Androgynous
Definition: A lesbian who is neither masculine nor feminine in appearance or behavior. Universally known as Unisex.

Chapstick Lesbian
Definition: Another term for Androgynous
Origins: Introduced in the late 1990’s to take on all those lipstick lesbians out there!

So there it is; my guide to lesbian terms. Short and simple, I know, but this should certainly keep you up with the rest of the pack. I often think, though, that many of the terms – such as Butch and Femme – relate to what the person is, or appears to be on the outside. All I can say is that I know some women that appear Butch on the outside but are as feminine, and soft, and flouncy, on the inside as any Femmes out there. Maybe some day these terms will evolve to describe personality, and emotions, but for now let’s just be satisfied that we finally understand what everyone’s harping on about!

You’re Not the Only Lesbian in Town!

Whether you’ve grown up all your life in a quiet, sleepy little town and just “Came Out”, or you’ve moved to the back of beyond with your partner, there’s no need to feel that you are the only lesbian – or lesbians – in town! It may seem like a sleepy, little place full of retired citizens and schoolteachers, but there’s a whole underground world out there that you haven’t explored! You’ll be surprised just how many lesbians come out of the woodwork when you know where to look. I reveal the easiest ways to find out what lesbians get up to in your local area and just how to hook up with them!

Look Online for Lesbian Groups
Something of a huge advantage to you is your PC. No home is complete without one nowadays, so get online and search for local lesbian groups in your area. It often happens that lesbians who live in remoter areas outside of major city centre gay and lesbian populations, make friends and meet up regularly by forming groups. They may just be groups that have trips to gay bars and clubs, or they may meet for a specific purpose. For example, there could be some lesbian art classes or lesbian literature groups. Just join one that sounds like your cup of tea; there’s no point in joining an art class if you hate drawing and lack any attention span! Many of them will mail out regular newsletters that you can subscribe to. These newsletters will tell you all the up-and-coming events that you can attend.

Lesbian Holidays
There are lots of companies that help to bring lesbians together by arranging lesbian-only holidays. This may only be camping in your local camp site, or walking in the nearby countryside, but if it gives you an opportunity to meet likeminded people then it’s well worth investigating. These tend to be inexpensive so don’t worry about having to take out a loan to meet other lesbians. All you’ll need is a tent, sleeping bag, and a bit of money towards food and drink, and you’ll probably have the time of your life. You never know, they may be organizing a trip to the next Gay Pride event and what better way to celebrate your sexuality than with new found friends!

Local Lesbian Bars and Clubs
You may laugh when you read this but there will probably be lesbian bars and clubs nearby to you. Sometimes they are secretive, or very well hidden, but they do exist. Once again you should use the internet as your resource as this will be able to tell you where the nearest bars and clubs are in your area – it may take you a few minutes, or a few days, to find these online, but, if you search long and hard enough, you will find them. If it feels a bit daunting heading out on your own then take a gay-friendly straight friend. They’ll probably have a whale of a time, and it will give you the opportunity to meet new people and mix in with lesbian crowds. You never know, people who you actually know may even be there; you just never knew they were lesbians!

Internet Chat Rooms
There are a lot of people out there that feel isolated from the lesbian world because of where they live, and many of them turn to internet chat rooms to find solace and comfort. However, once they step inside their first chat room they find that there are several people who live within a few miles radius of their own home chatting away! This can be a really useful way to make new friends, and potential partners. Just make sure that you can trust them implicitly before arranging to meet with them – as there can be some very sad and strange people online. You will also find that many lesbian chat rooms have message boards where you can add your own message. Why not try putting up your own asking for contact from people who live in your neck of the woods? You’ll be surprised just how many people reply!

Lesbian Magazines
You should also subscribe to lesbian magazines. They will be full of articles to keep you up to date with what’s going on in the world of lesbianism – and, quite often, they have events pages or pages of people looking for friends or relationships. You may even stumble across an advert for a local lesbian group. It’s well worth the few dollars it will cost you once a month!

Set Up Your Own
Alternatively, if all else fails and you just can’t find a group that appeals to you, or is even close by, then why not set up on your own? It’s not difficult! Offer a newsletter, set up a mini website or blog, and wait for local lesbians to start contacting you. You may need to advertise in local papers, or national magazines, if you want to organize trips or events, but you’ll be surprised just how many people will want to join!

There are so many lesbians that live near to you; you just don’t know it yet!

Americans Identifying as LGBTI+ Increased

According to a recent survey from the Gallup research firm, 5.6 percent of Americans are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or intersex people. This significant increase, which means about 18 million people, is attributed to the greater acceptance of LGBTI+ individuals in the society.

While this rate was 4.5 percent in Gallup’s 2017 survey, the result from the 2020 survey indicates a record jump of 24 percent. The main reason for the increase is from Generation Z adults aged 18-23. 15.9 percent of this generation say they are LGBTI+.

“At a time when the public is increasingly promoting equal rights for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, ınterex + people, a growing percentage of Americans identify as LGBTI+,” the Gallup website said.

In the 2020 election, the US saw Pete Buttigieg as the first openly gay presidential candidate. LGBTI+ candidates have had multiple historic wins, including Sarah McBride, the first open transgender state senator.

According to the Washington-based research center Public Religion Research Institute, Americans’ support for same sex marriage, which was legalized in 2015 and seen largely as a synonym for LGBTI+ rights, rose from 36 percent in 2007 to 62 percent in 2020.

The Gallup survey shows that 54.6 percent of LGBTI+ Americans identify as bisexual, 24.5 percent are gay men, 11.7 percent are lesbians and 11.3 percent are transgender.

For the first survey conducted in 2012, 15,000 Americans were randomly interviewed by phone throughout 2020. While 86.7 percent of the respondents identified themselves as heterosexual, 7.6 percent refused to respond to the interviewers. This rate was around 5 percent in past surveys.

There were significant differences between generations. Among those born before 1946, seniors were much less likely to see themselves as LGBTI+. The lowest rate was recorded as 1.3 percent.

Researchers found that women were more likely to describe themselves as LGBTI+ than men. While this rate was 4.9 percent for men, it was 6.4 percent for women. From a political point of view, 13 percent of liberal respondents and 2.3 percent of conservatives identified themselves as LGBTI+.

It is noted that there is a similar trend in England. According to government data, the proportion of people identifying themselves as lesbian, gay or bisexual increased from 1.6 percent in 2016 to 2.2 percent in 2018.

Rainbow Tattoo Ideas

Although the Indians, Japanese, Native Americans and some tribes in Africa used the tattoo as an ornament, in many societies the tattoo was applied as a protective talisman (amulet) against illnesses and evil spirits, the position of the individual in society (slave, master, adolescent, worker, soldier) It is known to be used to emphasize.

The tradition of tattooing is quite old. It was understood from mummies that tattoos were used in ancient Egyptian society in the 2000s BC. Apart from the Egyptians, Britons, Gauls and Thracians also had tattoos. The ancient Greeks and Romans used to make tattoos on criminals and slaves, which they deemed “a barbarian occupation”. Tattoo was prohibited in the Christian faith. In contrast, the first Christians had tattoos on their bodies bearing the name of Jesus or a cross. Centuries passed, Europeans forgot about tattoos. They encountered tattoos again in American Indians and Polynesians on overseas trips in the late 18th century. European languages have taken the word tattoo, which means tattoo, from the Tahitian word tautau. Tattoo became widespread especially among sailors after the early 20th century. Tattoo was widely used to indicate romantic feelings, patriotism or piety, and is still used today.

Tattoos are also used by the LGBTI+, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex+ Community.

I’ve compiled some rainbow tattoos for you…

If you wanted to have a tattoo, which tattoo did you get? You can comment…

UK’s First Openly Lesbian MP Maureen Colquhoun Has Died

Maureen Colquhoun passed away on February 2 at the age of 92. She was a member of the Labor Party, the first openly lesbian MP and a radical feminist far ahead of her time.

Calquhoun was born on August 12, 1928 in London, England. She graduated from the London School of Economics. She entered politics in the British Labor Party. She was a delegate to the UK Parliament from 1974 to 1979. First woman politician to enter parliament as a lesbian .

Colquhoun dies on January 2, 2021 at the age of 92 in London, England, birthplace.

Homeless Shelter for LGBTI+ Opened in Naples, Italy

Friday, February 5, was an important day for the Neapolitan LGBTI+ community: The House of Cultures and Hospitality opened to host LGBTI+ people who are victims of discrimination, abuse and violence.

The municipality structure, whose address cannot be disclosed for security and protection reasons, is three-level and will be managed by Antinoo Arcigay Napoli and ten other partner associations.

Shelter; It will serve LGBTI + individuals who are exposed to violence, harassment, discrimination and exclusion.

Naples Mayor Luigi De Magistris said the municipal shelter is the only one of its kind in Italy.

“Today is an extraordinary day for rights, freedoms and justice,” said Luigi De Magistris.

De Magistris said, “This building is a sign of change. Our city believes in emotions, brotherhood, solidarity, justice and reaching out to people in need.”

The associations that will be responsible for the operation of the shelter stated that this project will strengthen their efforts to “protect civil rights in Italy and the Mediterranean”.

Antinoo Arcigay Napoli Association, which is involved in the project, also stated that the shelter will “host Covid victims as well as victims of intolerance and hate”.

The association drew attention to the fact that the coronavirus epidemic mainly affects the most vulnerable people.

Italy is in the last rank for LGBTI+ Rights

In Italy, the law granting same-sex couples legal status under the name of “civil partnership” was passed in 2016.

Although this decision is a historical turning point in the country where the Catholic Church has strong influence, Italy is still at the bottom of LGBTI+ rights among Western European countries.

According to a Eurobarometer survey conducted by European Union institutions in 2019, the acceptance rate of LGBTI+”Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, +” individuals in Italy and the proportion of those who say that same-sex couples should have the same rights as heterosexual couples is below the European average.

Lesbians, women of genius

Lesbians, women of genius: Hong Kong star Denise Ho, who is mobilizing for democracy, iconic football player Megan Rapinoe who refuses to meet Trump, Adèle Haenel who broke Caesar: lesbians are making history, says activist Alice Coffin popularizing the concept of “lesbian genius.”

This article is from Libé’s feminism and sexuality newsletter L.

Lesbians have genius and we don’t know that. Collective Barbe and activist Alice Coffin from the European Lesbian Conference said, “They play a leading role in many social and political movements, and this is unspoken. There are many examples throughout history. Hong Kong pop star Denise Ho and the Umbrella Democratic movement, iconic American football player Megan Rapinoe. and refusal to see Trump in the White House, Black Lives Matter, founders of the black American movement, or tennis player Billie Jean King, who demanded equal pay to men in the 70s …

Being a lesbian is not only a romantic or sexual trend, but also a way to exist in the world. Doing it without people’s eyes will provide considerable political freedom, greater freedom of psychic thinking. “Lesbian genius is the capacity to think and grasp these mechanisms of society that are completely different from the codes prevailing in patriarchy. This genius is also the power to cultivate them, ”explains Alice Coffin. The concept was born in European militant circles, the French activist made a book for it and it was released by Grasset this spring. Speaking of lesbian genius is fighting one of the biggest discriminations lesbians suffer: invisibility. “The word ‘lesbian‘ is difficult to pronounce even in public spaces. With that word, we had to fight against Google that was sending spam messages directly,” Alice Coffin said.